Another one’s gone. Another bites the dust.
The candidates running for the Democratic nomination for President of the United States are dropping like flies. I know it was expected; the whole point of the primary is to whittle the large field down until you have the “best” candidate, but I wasn’t expecting the field to collapse as quickly as it did going into Super Tuesday. South Carolina changed everything. For starters, who knew there was a wrong way to back that ass up? I certainly did not know there was a way until I saw Tom Steyer on stage while Juvenile was performing Back That Azz Up. Some things you have to see for yourself, even if they’re incredibly cringeworthy.
Who knew that Back That Azz Up would be so prophetic? Before watching the CNN segment above, I was rooted in my belief that when Steyer got on stage and saw all those faces looking at him, he knew that this idea wouldn’t end well. He just had to have known that. I am curious about how that moment made it beyond: a fleeting thought, any personal embarrassment barriers, his lips, and anyone’s better judgment. It is wild because, he put together a noteworthy ground game in South Carolina meeting people and encouraging them to vote for him. He invested a lot of resources that he and his campaign team could have felt good about and left well enough alone. I had a lot of hope for him, I he was 6th on my list of people who I would vote for. As someone who went to grad school for Sustainability, I love how he centered his campaign around environmental justice. That is a very important issue to me and the candidate that gets my vote has to be able to speak on it comprehensively. Also before you think it, yes I know about his problematic billionaire business portfolio. I did say he was 6th on my list, didn’t I?
Well, in short order, the voters of South Carolina made him back that ass up out of the Democratic Primary (Side note: I can’t wait until his post-election memoir comes out. Maybe he will dive into this viral moment). My silliness vows to never let this go or for it to become a personal unsolved mystery.
It is what it is. Steyer is out of the race now. On to the next one.
Po’ Pete. Po’ Po’ Pete couldn’t build the coalition to mount a formidable campaign. Apparently, his Frederick Douglas Plan wasn’t enough to connect with black voters (Read this piece from The Washington Post to learn more about the plan he had to empower Black America). I didn’t think he stood a chance for many reasons (And no. Not a single one of those reasons was because of what you might be thinking). To be clear, what he did was extraordinary. To be the first openly gay candidate to run for President is incredible, but to actually be competitive and earn enough votes to be considered a leading contender for the nomination is a significant achievement. Hopefully, he goes back home to South Bend and uses his enhanced platform to heal a hurting community. Now on to the next one.
Oh, Amy… Bless her heart, she was really vying for the middle ground of mediocrity. She built her whole campaign on being the uninspiring adult in the room. I really wish Senator Klobuchar would have spent more time speaking on what we can do and not asking us if we have McDonald’s money. Also, Mayor Pete didn’t make it any easier for her. He too was vying for that middle ground and kept his foot on her neck every debate. He really tested her Minnesota nice. Now, if you seek Amy, you can find her on the trail advocating for Vice President Biden, it won’t be at the same place or time as Pete.
Let me preface this next part by establishing the fact that I am clairvoyant. Well, at least the all but dissertation type clairvoyant. I wasn’t born with the X-Gene, but I am good at being able to see ahead through overthinking to know how an event is going to play out. What I am going to write next didn’t require the assistance of any mutant powers to figure.
I thought by the time I finished this piece I would be able to make the prediction that Elizabeth Warren would drop out of the race next. I knew people wouldn’t want to hear that, and I would possibly be met with many side-eyes and maybe even some shade. Elizabeth Warren was the most substantively prepared from a policy standpoint! Her strong debate performances made a Warren presidency seem like a real possibility, but what became glaringly evident for me was that she had a plan for everything, but getting people to vote for her. Her lukewarm results in the first four states to vote in primary confirmed it for me. As someone who thought she was the best of what was left, (she was 3rd on my list of people I would vote for), I won’t bore you with another think piece on why she didn’t do well. You can google her name, and an excess amount of them will appear.
Now here is why I clarify that I am All but dissertation Clairvoyant, I didn’t expect her to lose everywhere on Super Tuesday. I thought she would at least pinch the 15% viability mark in every state voting that day. Liz didn’t even win one state. She didn’t win her home state. #YaHateToSeeIt I am sure that her campaign hated it more than anyone. What I also didn’t expect was that before Warren dropped out, Mike Bloomberg would. It was only 72 hours before, but that is a long time in a 24-hour news cycle. I knew her ethering him during the debate would affect his campaign, but I thought his stubbornness would keep him in the race.
I thought Bloomberg was going to stay in longer because he believed that Biden didn’t have the juice. He thought his own enormous wealth would allow him to self-fund himself to the White House. The only thing that I thought would get him to end his campaign early was if he was slain on the first Super Tuesday (which ended up being the case). The fruit of his over $600 million dollar campaign run was his one win in America Samoa out of 14 states and one territory that voted. I am sure he always remember the territory with fondness in his heart. He will gladly tell people that they should go to American Samoa because they loved him back there. He is huge in Kinloch, I mean America Samoa (If you don’t get that reference watch this clip from the iconic movie Jackie’s Back).
As for the other primary, the Republican one, that ended before it began. The party made it clear to the candidates who wanted to challenge the incumbent that they weren’t welcome, and they wouldn’t get a chance to debate him on stage. I mean, I know there was a better chance of me being able to get online and book my summer vacation, but it would have been interesting to see that play out.
I close with this prediction. The winner of the 2020 Election will be the old white guy.